I debated whether to talk about this or not, and after much thought i think it's something worth talking about. So SSD put up a TTTEC post about a young girl who had been raped by a friend, you can go read the post here. The point of TTTEC is so that pple can put in their 2 cents and possibly help out the pple or person involved with the issue. Unfortunately, this was really not the case in this post even though there was 91 comments before SSD put a stop to comments. People went wild in the comments, attacking each other, their families, personal attacks on looks, tribes and what not. I was very disappointed to say the least.
Before i continue here is what i think, there is no question that they girl was raped. She has no reason to lie, especially as she is reluctant to even confront the guy. If she had sex with the guy and she is ashamed then she has no need to even talk about it, she would have just kept it a secret. I don't think anyone should question her or ask her why she drank or why she didn't go home with her friend. All that is split milk. What we should have done was give her practical advice. What should she and her friend do now that the deed has been done. The truth of the matter is that the things that would work in America would not necessarily work in Nigeria. If you simply go to the police and say i've been raped, chances that anything tangible would be done is slim. Our police force leaves a lot to be desired, at the same time though, I know if your family has money and you are ready to pursue it, stuff can be done. I know of a girl when i was in Uniben that was gang raped. She was from a wealthy home and she was the only daughter, trust me when i say heads rolled. Her father made sure those guys were tracked down. So I think something can be done, if nothing else she can at least seek some help to deal with what happened so she can move on. I know there are not a lot of licensed psychologists in Nigeria, so she can talk to someone who can be objective and not judge her and help her work through her issues.
Now on to the craziness that occurred. My philosophy in life is "Live and Let Live". I can tell you what my opinion is, but i won't shove it down your throat. You don't have to agree with me, therefore i won't spend too much time trying to convince you when it's obvious you don't want to be convinced. If it was an appropriate forum, i would say it's okay to argue but when it started to get personal, i just became disgusted. Sometimes i hate people, i really do. What does someone's weight have to do with anything? Most Nigerian bloggers are anonymous, including me. So if someone is comfortable enough to put her picture up, why take cheap shots at how she looks?
I was reading trying to figure out how this just disintegrated into a free for all, where someone even felt comfortable bringing someone's innocent child into the mix and from what i can see, Waffarian made a general comment (which i agreed with 100%) and Ms. Nitty Gritty took it personal even though no name was mentioned. Then our darling Sugabelly jumped into the mix and said something about beating Ms. Nitty Gritty with a shoe. I think that's when all hell broke loss. Not cool at all.
Who died and made me a judge? No one. I was just very saddened to read what went on after that and i really don't want to be a part of a community that is capable of spewing such hateful things under the guise of anonymity. It was clear to see that after a certain point, pple just wanted to argue and fight just for the sake of it. There was no longer a purpose to the argument except to point fingers and try to hurt each other 's feelings. Truly shameful. All the name calling and threats were unnecessary. We can do better as a community and we should.